Years ago my brother had,
between his legs, a blister.
He tried to pop it with a knife
and now I have a sister.
as the rain fell down.As the rain fell down
I felt it cleansing my soul.
Washing over my frown
That the laughs couldn't console.
Like a cool summer breeze
The water felt so pure.
For my disease,
the rain is the cure.
50 words.It's dark and raining as I'm sitting at the traffic lights, waiting for them to change.
A song I like comes on the radio so I turn it up louder. Too loud.
I can't hear the screams telling me to watch out for the car that hits me from behind.
Milk flavoured jelly beansNot being able to say
What I truly feel
Although I seem like I've lost my way
I won't need much time to heal
My heart is like a piece of debris,
Battered and worn, I'm a terrible host.
It's the scars you don't see
That torment me the most.
That bitch can die
Or I'll go first
You can't run with a knife in your thigh
Yeah... make her live with my curse.
But people don't care about others
They only worry about themselves.
Why would anyone bother my mother
About my state of mental health?
OppositesAlthough I am quiet
you're loud and bombastic.
I choose to use recyclable bags,
you prefer to use plastic
I'd enjoy a quiet night in
You want to go to a concert.
I cringe at the mere thought of pain,
you don't mind when you're hurt
If something is impossible,
you do it with ease.
When I would say "thank you",
you always say "please"
I may not know much
but I know this for a fact:
It is truly intriguing
how opposites attract.
Let the dark embrace me..."Let the dark embrace me,"
I say as you cry.
This phase will not erase me
From in front of your eyes.
My heart is still beating
but there's not long to go.
Life and death competing
to get me to go.
Your tears mix
and merge with my blood
like water and dirt
both mix to make mud.
It's not an eclipse
but the light is becoming shy.
"Let the dark embrace me,"
I say as I die...
Shrek is Love Shrek is lifeShrek Is Love Shrek is Life.
I was only 9 years old I loved shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies
I pray to shrek every night before bed thanking him for the life I've been given.
Shrek is love I say, Shrek is life
My dad overhears me and calls me a faggot
I knew he was just jealous of my devotion for Shrek
I called him a cunt
He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
Im crying now, and my face hurts
I lay in bed and its really cold
A warmth is moving towards me.
I feel something touch me
I am so happy
He whispers in to ear "this is my swamp
He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands and puts me on my hands and knees
I spread my ass cheeks for Shrek
He penetrates my butthole
It hurts so much but I do it for Shrek
I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water
I push against his force
I want to please Shrek
He roars a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his love
My dad walks in
Shrek looks him straight in the eye and says "Its all ogre now"
Jeff the Killer X ReaderYou were sitting in the living on the couch on your computer (watching youtube vids/ FB/etc) when you came across Creepypasta the first on you read was Jeff the Killer. You didn't think to much about it. You notice it was strangely quit in your house but you shrugged it off. You then notice something again you shrugged it off and continued to read on. Once you were done reading you took your computer to your room to watch funny videos. You then felt as if someone was behind you. You turned you saw none of other than Jeff the Killer holding his knife and said "GO TO SLEEP" you like trolling people cause it was funny and he reminded you of the Joker so said "Hey Jeff" with a confused look he responded "What?" he asked and you said "Why so serious?" Jeff gave you th You-got-to-be-kidding look while you sat there and continued to troll him "Hey ... where's Batman huh Joker" after some time of trolling Jeff you chatted to your Friend on Skype and told (him/her) about you experience and what
PRO-CHOICE POEM.PRO CHOICE POEM.
I am 4 inches long and I have all my organs. I cannot think or love yet, but I enjoy sucking out your protein.
I am starting to take shape and I look like a dinosaur. I know I cannot really think, I am unconscious and has no feelings, but it is the fault of the pro-life writers Bean's parodying that really think these shitty poems will work. Just play along, k?
I am a boy! You can obviously tell since the ultrasound showed I have a HUGE cock! I'm gonna be a jigglo rapist mum! Just like my daddy!
Your mind has gone crazy, you have been to the psychiatrist. I can feel your heartbeat, it is irregular. I can hear your tears of fear, I wish I could do something.
I have heard you are going to have an abortion next week. I heard your disscussion and I know it was hard for you, but what is a life being a rape child?
I am in heaven now mommy,
FiM++ Programming - Hello World, 99 Jugs of CiderDear Princess Celestia: Letter One
Today I Learned an important lesson about friendship.
I learned how to write "Hello World!"
Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.
P.S. In this case, the syntax is similar to C++.
Dear Princess Celestia: Letter One
I wrote "Hello World!"
Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.
P.S. In this case, the syntax mirrors that of Python syntax. I'll leave it to you, readers, to decide which one you deem better. -Twilight Sparkle
Dear Princess Celestia: Letter One
Today I learned how to sing Applejack's Drinking Song.
I learned Applejack's Drinking Song with Applejack.
Did you know that Applejack likes the number 99?
I did this while Applejack had more than 1.
I sang " 'Applejack' jugs of cider on the wall, 'Applejack' jugs of cider,"
Applejack got one less.
When Applejack had more than 1,
I sang "Take one down and pa
When life gives you LEMONS...When life gives you lemons, SUCK THEM.
When life gives you lemons, squirt lemon juice in their eyes.
When life gives you lemons, give them back and demand for chocolates.
When life gives you lemons, paint them red & call them APPLES.
When life gives you lemons, throw em hard like hand grenades.
When life gives you hand grenades, paint them yellow, disguise them as lemons and pull the pin.
When life gives you lemons, make lemon peel wings and fly too close to the sun. Trust me, they won't melt.
When life gives you lemons, shove 'em thru yer ass and die.
When life gives you lemons, use them as a dildo.
When life gives you lemons, feed yo mama n make her so fat so people can jog around her for exercise.
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. No no, you eat those lemons, THEN sell your PEE as LEMONADE.
When life gives you lemons, THEYRE THE NEW GREEN DAY HEART GRENADES.
When life gives you lemons, PUKE.
When life gives you lemons, who needs plastic surgery on yer chest?
When life gives
Why I Hate My LifeWhy I Hate My Life:
Despite the fact that I'm a trained professional
I have to work odd-jobs making deliveries on a motorcycle
The only girl who I ever loved
was just using me as a replacement
The only girl that actually likes me
runs a bar and took over my house
I don't have the guts to kick her out
so I end up sleeping at an abandoned church
I've recently picked up a strange rash
it hurts and I have to wear sleeves to cover it
My only friends are a guy that never comes out from a forest
and a girl that's always looking to steal the meager possessions I have
Everything sucks really
because the one person who cared about me
is already dead...
He was my army buddy, always cool, always the best
I visit his grave sometimes, in the middle of long deliveries
The worst part about everything though
is the fact that the one guy who made my life hell
The one guy who took everything important away from me
just came back to town a few minutes ago...
And you know what he said the moment
Awesome quotes by Gerard Way
Awesome quotes by Gerard Way (lead singer of My Chemical Romance)-
Be yourself, don't take anyone's shit, and never let them take you alive.
Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic's best friend!
I'm not psycho...I just like psychotic things.
The Devil got landed with a shitty job, he has to deal with assholes everyday, he's probably bored as hell.
Look at me, with my pretty bracelet and tiara... I'm a fuckin' princess!
It's like the drag fairy coming and saying 'What would you like to do?' Um, yeah karate.
I'd rather be a creature of the night than an old dude.
So many people treat you like you're a kid so you might as well act like one and throw your television out of the hotel window.
I went to school in drag, in art school and my day was completely different because everybody thought I was a chick. You should see me as a chick. So I went as a girl, as like an experimen
3 WordsThere are 3 words I wished
I could have whispered in your ears.
Just 3 words.
Yet they are so powerful that they could
Make the mightiest man cry.
As much as I would have wanted to say them,
I didn’t know how.
Too awkward, I suppose.
Many have tried
And it ruined their connections.
So I kept it in.
To hold on
To what we already had.
Of tears & Laughter.
I didn’t want to let go of that.
I was too afraid,
To make things worse than they were.
Ah yes, today,
I will break that silence.
Before I die,
I want to tell you,
I hate you.
Chuck Norris Pokemon Jokes"If Chuck Norris was a Pokemon..."
Chuck Norris would be the element of surprise.
When Chuck Norris runs out of power points, he doesn't struggle: he wins.
Chuck Norris has no weaknesses. Only resistances.
Chuck Norris has never seen a Ditto. And a ditto has never seen Chuck Norris.
Every experience point Chuck Norris earns takes him to the next level.
Team Rocket is hiding because of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can learn more than four moves.
Every one of Chuck Norris's moves is super-effective.
A Chuck Norris egg has never been found because Chuck Norris is no chicken.
Chuck Norris's tackle attack is considered a One-Hit K.O.
Chuck Norris can cause sleep, poison, confusion, paralysis, and burn at the same time.
Chuck Norris is also immune to sleep, poison, confusion, paralysis and burn.
Pokemon flee when Chuck Norris is nearby.
If you encounter a wild Chuck Norris, then you have to restart the game.
Chuck Norris is automatically Locked-On to all this targets.